how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
