Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
How naked do you want me to be?
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