I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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