They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Randomize