just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize
