I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
