You really coming over, don't trick.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Randomize
