google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
