There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Randomize