no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
