awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
