sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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