You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
