i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize