that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
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