what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
