talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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