there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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