Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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