I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
