What did we do last night that was yellow?
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
