Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I am spending my child support on dildos
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize