i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
It's never too late to be topless.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize