ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
