I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
