I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
