he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Boobs speak an international language.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
