Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
