take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Randomize