Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
