I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
