I wish i was in the wii world.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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