so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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