I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
