He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Randomize
