I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
