problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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