I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
