I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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