If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
