I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize