ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Randomize
