i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
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