I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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