Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
