ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Randomize
