2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
