There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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