wake up i wanna do it froggy style
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
