Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Randomize
